Do What It Says...

I came across James chapter 1 today as I was talking to the Lord (or, more accurately, as He was talking to me) and it said in verse 22-25:  "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.  Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.  But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom (I love that part!), and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it - he will be blessed in what he does."

It was though the Lord confirmed in my heart what I consistently ask using my "internal mirror" - who am I and who do I want to become?  I want to be exactly as this verse says - to do faith rather than talk about faith.  To live in honest submission to the Holy Spirit.  Right now, this means submitting a huge burden of grief for the days and months that follow as Penelope is without our family.  I feel immense sorrow that I am not there for her in this moment.  But, then, I also would be stealing away possible last precious moments between birth mother (Emaye) and daughter: moments of tear streaked kisses before Penny is transitioned to a place that may provide her with hope and promise.

And then I also have to recognize that in this time of waiting, I am learning more about the amount of faith the Lord requires of me - unabashed faith - the kind of faith that just waits in expectation of what God can and will do.  I trust in the promises of His Word.  I trust that Mighty God waits in great expectation for me to just stretch out my hands to the sky, just as my children do to get a taste of the April rain on their tongues, and say "Pour out your blessings Mighty God - I am ready."